Loving yourself is as old as the human race. Yet self-satisfaction in many places is still a taboo, and considered a moral weakness and even a sin. Something you heard for years was that masturbation makes you blind, or that sperm became weakened, or after 1,000 climaxes the sperm is all gone. Especially for women it was taboo. A woman who pursued her desire was branded a witch or easy. In many countries the clitoris and passion are still today considered impure, and female circumcision is carried out, often with deadly consequences.
Even in partnerships and among friends, one hardly talks about it, although according to a study at the University of Bonn, 90% of men and 86% of women regularly masturbate.
It’s no surprise that doing it yourself is often not so bad, and even less surprising that the first orgasm is usually experienced after playing with yourself. Because playing with yourself and taking your time to find out what touches feel best or most arousing is the best way to get to know your own body.
Once you know how to bring yourself to climax, then it is much easier to show your partner the way. But even here there seems to be a lack of openness. Most people surveyed said the most reliable way to a climax was doing it themselves. Yet it could be so easy to initiate your partner in the secrets of your own desire.
A passionate approach to your own body not only boosts desire for yourself and in your partnership, it also clearly contributes to the physical and mental well-being. For example, headaches. Instead of reaching for a cure in the medicine cabinet – which often has side effects – try out some solo sex the next time you’re suffering. An orgasm can make that pulsing pain disappear. The cocktail of hormones that are released during solo sex and an orgasm contain natural pain blockers and endorphines which lift us back up. So sex is a side-effect free answer to pharmaceutical solutions and it’s a lot more fun than swallowing a bitter pill.
It doesn’t matter what gender. During solo sex, everyone’s health benefits. While it trains women’s pelvic muscles, protecting then against incontinence and a prolapsed uterus, in men a passionate handling of his member even improves the prostate and quality of sperm. Scientists have even found in the blood of men who just had an orgasm an increase in leukocytes. These are killer cells from the immune system. So in contrast to all the historical and moral myths, modern medicine clearly proves that self-satisfaction doesn’t weaken the body, it even strengthens it.
And for anyone who is still doubtful – maybe Woody Allen can help. “Masturbation is sex with someone you really love.”
So just do it!
I am full on LOVE, …
… because a confident, self-determined and natural approach to sexuality is good for everyone.